The Queen of Bada Bing Farm

I thought I would introduce you to each of my goats…one at a time.  The first being, Miss Dew Drop Rose who is most definitely our Herd Queen.  Heaven forbid I start with any other goat.  She would be so mad and we all would pay for it.

Dew Drop Rose was our very first Nubian doe purchased in the spring of 2005.  She was just a yearling then.  We drove all the way to near Pittsburg and got her from Mandi at Ziggy Acres.  She immediately claimed our farm as “hers” and has been the boss of not only all the other goats that have come and gone since then, but she is ALSO the boss of us too!

She has a wonderful attitude.  That take charge, get out of my way, charm that we just love about her.  She can humble any new comer by just giving them the “stink eye” as I call it.  She stares them down, they immediately drop their head in submission and walk away.  They know right off the bat, just who is in charge.

Dew had triplets her first kidding and followed that up with quads the last two years.  We often joke with each other that if we “flushed” her, she might have something ridiculous like 10 babies.  She just simply lays down, pops them out, looks at me as if to say “All done!  Where’s my molasses water, grain, and hurry up and milk me now”.  She loves cigarettes and coffee.  She will mow anyone down with a lit cigarette in their hand (ask my husband who still smokes).  She chased Mikey this past winter when she smelled the coffee in his cup and quickly drank it all.  Every morning she has to get a good “whiff” of my coffee breath!

She is the first to be greeted, the first to be milked, the first to be fed and by God, she had better be first or there will be HELL to pay.  If someone goes before her, she starts beating on the rest of the herd as if to remind everyone she is the boss and goes first…ALWAYS! 

She approves of all goat adoptions.  When I bring prospective buyers down to the barn she immediately checks them out.  Dew has been known to not allow buyers to take home a baby.  Most times she comes and smells you, then walks away giving her blessing.  Other times she will firmly plant herself between them and the rest of the herd as if to say “No way are you taking anyone home with you!”  I have learned to trust her judgement.  She is usually completely right!

Dew loves to show.  You can take her anywhere.  She loves it.  I think because she is just so darn nosey and wants to know what is going on.  Our kids take her into the ring and she prances around with her head held high.  She glides around the ring, turns her nose up at all the other goats, stops and sets herself up as if to say, “Hey judge…don’t you wish you were as drop dead gorgeous as me!”  If she doesn’t win, then they were all just jealous or blind as a bat!  She’s the best there ever was or will be and everyone else is just too stupid to realize it.

She is in love with my husband.  She will push me to the side and run to him when she hears his voice.  He of course knows better and always stops to greet her.  He’ll give her a good petting and say “Hello Mama”.  He knows that he better or he will pay the price.  One particular afternoon he was in the goat pasture fixing some fencing.  He was pounding a fence post in when he dropped his hammer on his foot.  Dew was standing beside him, getting impatient for her greeting.  He got mad because she was in his way and in his face so to speak.  He pushed her aside.  She immediately reared up and head butted him just below the belt (her way of say…”I don’t think so buddy!”).  Vince was humbled and I of course darn near wet my pants laughing so hard.  He couldn’t stay mad, he had just been put in his place by a goat that weighed half as much as him.

Her best buddy is Countess Marie.  Why?  Because Countess isn’t stupid and knows who to suck up to.  You will find them cuddled together for an afternoon nap.  Dew of course using Countess as a pillow (never the other way around as that would be beneath Dew to allow).  Dew will be snoring loudly and yes I mean snoring loudly.  Don’t you dare think of disturbing her beauty sleep either.  It takes a lot of work to keep everyone in their place so she needs her sleep.

She will not step outside either if the conditions aren’t just right.  The sun has to be shining 30 degrees from the west, it can’t be raining, or have rained in the past 12 hours, the ground has to be dry because she isn’t getting her feet wet or muddy, it must be in the 70’s or otherwise it is too cold or too hot, and most of all…NO FLIES, BUGS, OR BITTING INSECTS OF ANY KIND.  You will find her sticking out her nose of the barn door to get a good sniff to make sure the conditions are right.  Finally she will come out and stand.  If one fly lands on her, that’s it!  She is off and running for the barn, stomping her feet and flicking her long ears in disgust!

So that is Dew Drop Rose, the Herd Queen, known as Mama Dew around here.  She is in charge, this is her farm, he barn, her pasture, and her goats.  We are blessed by her presence and feel priveldge to pick up her manure after her. 

ALL HAIL THE QUEEN OF BADA BING FARM!

 

About asciotti

Please keep in mind that I never grew up on a farm, lived in the city or its suburbs all my life. Many farmers out there will find this blog a hoot as I stumble through the every day life of running a farm (most of the time...all by myself).
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One Response to The Queen of Bada Bing Farm

  1. Michelle says:

    It was great fun to read about Dew; what a character! I love goats, but don’t know if I’ll ever have another one; the Shetlands have my heart and my property now.

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